Until...

There are some things that are unimaginable, unfathomable, and hard to wrap your mind and heart around, until you become a mother.  The oh so grand, keeps you awake at night, heart wrenching, lovely, type of love that comes with the birth of your children.  The type of love that is unmoved even when the kids are driving you up the wall and you think you can't take another minute of disciplining them.  The type of love that brings you to tears when you see a diaper commercial and realize one of your kids is too big for diapers and the other soon will be.  This kind of love is the biggest kind of love and I believe it to be the closest to the love that God has for us.
It is this love that has made me laugh, cry, swell with pride, learn to give everything I have to someone else, and many other things that have made me a better person.  It is also this same love that drives me.  It forces me to be aware at all times and to think of all scenarios so as to keep my children safe in all situations.  I would climb mountains, dive into the ocean, run in front of traffic, kill a person, if it meant keeping my children safe.  This is how crazy one becomes after becoming a mother.
I remember thinking my mom was crazy..turns out she was..crazy with a love for her kids.  And now I feel that same kind of craziness and I understand what my mom was thinking when I was younger.  As crazy as this love makes me feel, I really hope that I also learn to let go when the time is right.  There are stepping stones in every child's life where they need to be let go, little by little, until, when the all too soon day comes and they become adults and the mother has to give the final let go.  This is the heart wrenching part of the crazy mom love.  Letting go.  Letting go of the person you fed, changed, bathed, taught, and loved like no other.  Letting go and hoping they listened to your instruction along the way.  Letting go and hoping they remember the crazy love and appreciate it.  Letting go and letting God...